Hey everyone. theres a lot thats happened the last couple of days, some stuff that have upset many people, and some stuff that will tear friendships apart. The only thing i will say is that people should be able to own up to what they did, and people should be able to admit they were wrong. but all is good. one can only hope that people go back who they truly are, not some extraverted persona.
anyways, lets not dwell on such ugly issues for much longer. so what do we talk about today? well i had a request to discuss commitment...or lack there of. why is it so hard for someone to become committed? most people are under the assumption that it is the male that finds it hard to commit, claiming "one poke and their happy". statistics actually show however, that it is the female that finds it hard to commit. of all the singles in australia at the moment, 78% of them claim to be single by choice and "fear of commitment. Of that 78%, 69% are females. that is proportionally MUCH higher than the male share. Furthermore, of all females surveyed, 95% said that if they were out on a friday or saturday night without a male companion around, they would actively look for someone to "hook up" with. (Yiu, 2011).
Statistics dont lie, but there must be some sort of motivation behind these statistics. There can be a few reasons as to why people find it hard to commit. The first and foremost is fear. As humans, one of our basic needs is to belong. what most people are scared of is being let down. The feeling of isolation and loneliness is one that most people find hard to deal with, the thought of being not wanted anymore cuts down deep. The ones that are most affected by this factor are those that generally have been let down before. they shy away from relationships because they dont want to experience that disappointment again, they dont want to feel as if their whole world is breaking down around them.
another possible motivation is the love of "the Game". There are some people out there that enjoy the chase so much that when a girl starts becoming attracted to them they instantly lose interest. I've written briefly about the enjoyment in a previous post (maybe an elaborate post later? you tell me), but anyways, the captivation of chasing, the enjoyment of living on the edge of an emotional rollercoaster gives a high that sometimes a real rollercoaster cant provide. commitment just doesnt come naturally to these people, but eventually, they will meet the right one and settle down. its always the butterfly effect.
the other possible motivation are those that are way too concerned with the future and forget about the present. Some people drown themselves in their career, some people are unwilling to commit to one that they know may not be the one, and some people just want to live life without boundaries. Looking into the future
is important, but forgetting about the present will destroy you. Enjoy the life that you live, look forward into the future, but don't let your eyesight go bad. because whatever you see in the crystal ball your mind creates is never the reality you live in.
At the end of the day, the choice to commit is one that is personal, but one that can lead to both dire consequences and unbounded happiness. Whatever you choose, be guided by the wingflaps of the butterfly. Let fate decide your future, but control fate as a butterfly can control a hurricane.
Trevz
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